The ways of coffee and failure

[terajk]

Make an icon for littlebutfierce (I am such a noob at making icons, y'all. Someday I will make an icon with properly legible text).

Write 750 322 words of character notes for fic for thingswithwings

Rewatch "The Beach" for fic for lizbee. Actually, about halfway through this turned into: "Mainline almost the entire first season of Adventure Time and some of the second." I am scared/avoidy of fic for lizbee because the execution makes or breaks EVERYTHING. Right now, the execution is closer to "broken." As soon as everyone got close to Deep Emotional Things they were like, "We're done, right? Yeah, we're done. End the story, please." Perhaps I should remind them that not only is Marceline 1000+ years old and a survivor of some kind of apocalypse and killed the Vampire King, but she is so badass she EXPRESSES HER FEELINGS:

But I could also write the expression of feelings the slightest bit wrong, in which case EVERYTHING BREAKS. And writing Azula's dialogue is like walking a tightrope while the net is on fire at the best of times. This is not necessarily a bad thing; yeah, there's the whole "OH CRAP IF I GET OUT OF THIS VERY NARROW SPACE EVERYTHING IS WRONG," but on the other hand, her understanding of people and how she relates to them are also very narrow and remove a lot of options.

Also, OH CRAP! ZUKO! In a lot of post-canon Azula and Zuko fic I've read, Zuko is a really nice, caring guy who loves his sister and wants to take care of her, etc., etc. (In fact, I have written him this way once). But...there are a lot of feelings when a family member becomes disabled, and they aren't all "I love you"? Especially if this person is an abuser who wrecked your childhood? (So he has complicated feelings about her in general. And both of them have complicated feelings about their dad and OH NO WTF HAVE I DONE?) And aside from all that, some of Zuko's feelings are ableist and annoy me. How do I respect his feelings when they make me go: "Uh..." and "I should probably problematize this in the text" and then "OH NO THAT WILL MAKE IT 1000X HARDER TO WRITE GODDAMNIT."

I'd also like to remind myself that EVERY DAMN TIME I'm about to have some kind of breakthrough on a project, I am like: "I'm scared and avoiding this/This sucks and I hate it forever." Even when I was a kid and would play video games, I'd be like: "I can never beat this game I am never playing it again!" and then beat the level/stupid boss.

So! Because I'd like lizbee's fic done or close enough by the time white_lotus assignments go out (this may not happen), here is my plan. I will get off here and finish watching "The Beach"; then I will take my laptop down to the library and write. If I need to massively delete things, I will save them in a "graveyard" file. Then I will come home and play that game I have to review for work, which I am avoiding because it isn't much fun. (You guys! Giant mech games have huge potential for awesome! But all the giant mech games I play are boring. WTF?)

Comments

[lizbee]

Yup. I was also struck by how nice of a dad Ozai was in Zuko's memories.

The bit that makes me choke up is the flash of Iroh and Lu Ten playing with baby Zuko.

Yup. I was also struck by how nice of a dad Ozai was in Zuko's memories.

Everything in "The Promise" could have been avoided if Azula had been around to remind people that Zuko is much happier when he's had a chance to burn some shit.

(Suki's shocked that she isn't more disgusted, Katara and Zuko are dying of embarrassment and Toph is just laughing at everyone).

FACT.

Also, Sokka's general sideways approach to masculinity, not to mention how good he looks in a Kyoshi Warrior outfit is ... full of potential, yes.